question mark

?

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Matt’s Notes

For Papa to write nothing but a question mark obviously means more than if he left a page blank or wrote something simple like “nothing of significance” or even “dull.” It’s as if we’ve asked him how his life is going and he’s responded with a sad little shrug.

?

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Matt’s Notes

It’s late summer and the year is moving along, and Papa’s diary entries are starting to feel increasingly precious. I’m hungry for any shred of information about what he did on even the most ordinary day. But as he did yesterday, Papa looks at his life and questions whether there’s really anything worth reporting. Each day without monumental change feels uninteresting to him, adds to his sense of stasis, and therefore qualifies only for a quick, resigned shake of the head and a helpless-looking question mark on a page.

[posted from Mexico]

?

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Matt’s Notes

Like yesterday and the day before, Papa finds nothing interesting to report about his day and, with a single question mark, asks whether his life is worth discussing at all.

Slowly, slowly, in the coming years he would realize his life mattered. But on this day he had only a vague sense that it should, but not how it would.